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Remakes are a tricky beast.  No one really wants them to be made.  If there was a large fanbase for a previously released film that could justify a cult following, there would an equally large enough demographic of people who were just fine with the old movie and didn’t need to see it recast, reshot, and re… somethinged.  I’ve watched this happen dozens of times with dozens of movies and every time there’s some vocal section of fandom that are calling for the heads of those who have “raped our childhood” with their careless and butchering remake of a “heartfelt classic.”   Personally, I don’t see the problem.  If they ever made a remake of, say, Escape from New York, I’d just go watch it, roll my eyes, and then go home and watch my remastered DVD version.  It’s the studio’s money.  Let them blow it on whatever they want.  No one is forcing you to watch their crap.

This brings me to a film that I kind of adore for its sheer disregard for all things logical, realistic, and well-crafted.  We’re talking about Death Race.  A very loose remake of the cult classic, Death Race 2000, the updated version stars Jason Statham and Tyrese Gibson as prisoners of the Terminal Island Penitentiary that are forced to compete in the world’s highest-rated televised sports program, Death Race.  The characters are paper-thin, the cast (which includes the actual talents of Joan Allen and Ian McShane) is forced to recite stilted and awkward dialogue, and the physics of the action scenes defies all known reason.  This is, of course, Why I Like Bad Movies.   We follow Statham’s character of Jensen Ames, framed for the murder of his wife and sentenced to life in prison, as the crooked warden of Terminal Island (Allen) offers him the role of Frankenstein, a fan favorite celebrity in the game, as a way out of jail.  Ames begrudgingly accepts and gets wrapped up in the chaos and violence that is the Death Race with prisoners piloting suped up cars armed to the teeth with firepower and armor for the chance at freedom.  There are no twists that are unpredictable and no action scenes that can be described as “subtle,” but this movie really does manage to satisfy all of the needs of a true action movie junkie.  Director Paul W.S. Anderson has a ton of great “bad” movies under his belt with Soldier, Resident Evil, and Event Horizon topping the list and he adds Death Race with a childish fervor of action and sly wink at the standards of “quality.”

Whether it’s Statham spewing punchy one-liners with his unbelievably hot (and I mean that as, “she’s way too hot to be believable”) co-pilot, the action scenes that combine NASCAR and the Road Warrior, or completely throwaway character of Machine Gun Joe for Tyrese to play, Death Race fires on all cylinders (I had to use a pun) of truly great awful movie making.  It’s another reason Why I Like Bad Movies.